OH MY GOD OKAY SO I WAS AT MY FRIEND NICK’S HOUSE AND HE SAT DOWN NEXT TO HIS PARENTS AND HE SAID “mom dad i’m straight…” AND THEY LOOKED SO CONFUSED BUT THEN HE SAID “STRAIGHT UP BISEXUAAAAAALLLLL” AND LEAPED OUT OF THE ROOM I’M NOT JOKING THIS IS HIS IDEA OF COMING OUT I’M GOING TO PISS.
“I try so hard not to generalize men, you know? I try SO hard. But then the other night I went out with my friends and the car was full and I looked around and realized that every single one of the women in that car had been raped or sexually assaulted and it’s like, how can you not hate them? It’s not fair. But it’s not fair that they do this to us and then act like it isn’t a problem.”—
I actually really disagree with the point made above by bigfatfeminist. And maybe that makes me a bad feminist, but I think that making any generalizing “I hate…” statement based on sex, race, gender, sexual orientation, etc is wrong.
I’m not really vibing with the the privileged/oppressed logic used in the linked post either. I don’t think that being a part of an oppressed group gives someone the right to be hateful to an entire group. I certainly think oppressed people have the right to be angry, and should have the right to fight for their rights and equal privilege. But being anti-hate and then hating right back? Nah man. Still hypocritical. And it certainly doesn’t solve the problem of a lack of equality.
Also, that “#Every man is a rapist until proven otherwise” tag that the person I rebloged this from used? I think it’s kind of horrible, and possibly sexist (that’s right, I think it’s possible to be sexist towards men; more “supposedly horrible feminist” points for me). It’s like saying “Every white person is racist until proven otherwise” or “Every straight person is homophobic until proven otherwise” or “Every cisgendered person is transphobic until proven otherwise”. See, doesn’t it sound pretty ridiculous?
Look, I get living in fear. I get being angry. I agree with the quote; it’s hard not to say “I hate men” when looking at a group of victims. But throwing up our hands and giving up and saying, “Fuck it, this is okay because we’ve been oppressed” does not help the fight for equality and the erasure of privilege. It just doesn’t.
I don’t believe in hating all men because some are rapists, and I don’t believe in making all men grovel before me in penance for the crimes some of them have committed. I’ve never met a black person who asked me or all white people to apologize for segregation, I’ve never met a gay person who wants all straight people to apologize for DOMA/DADT/etc, and I’m not going to be the kind of woman who makes all men apologize for rape.
So, get angry at me, call me a terrible feminist, insult me, what have you. But I think that if you want to stop hate, you might as well start with yourself.
You know that moment when you’re reading a book and you just have to stop and bite your lip and squeal or sigh or close your eyes and wrinkle your nose and forehead and press the book against your heart and just like sit there and try to soak up the gorgeous literature via osmosis?
THERE WAS JUST AN ANT ON MY LEG! WHERE ARE THESE BUGS COMING FROM?!?!?!?!? WHAT DO THEY WANT WITH ME?!?!?!?! I AM BEING ABDUCTED BY SCARY THINGS WITH MANY LEGS! SEND HELP! OR AN EXTERMINATOR! WHICHEVER RESPONDS FASTER!
why am I always the one that gets stuck with the huge, scary bugs in the bathroom in the middle of the night? Killing bugs was not on my agenda nor was a mini heart attack. Fine whatever. I killed the bug. I’m not picking it up. My heart can’t take it.